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Dear Jill,
I babysit and earn money but my sister expects that I will babysit for free because the kids are my nieces. I don't think this is fair. What should I do or say to my sister?

Dear Sylvia,
A sensitive situation! I totally understand your perspective. Here's a suggested approach:
Communicate your concerns
Choose a good time to talk to your sister when you're both relaxed.
Start with a positive tone: "Hey, sis, I love spending time with the kids, and I'm happy to help out."
Express your concerns: "However, I feel like I'm being taken advantage of when I'm expected to babysit for free. I use my time to earn money, just like you do."
Be clear and direct: "Going forward, I'd appreciate it if we could discuss compensation for my babysitting services, just like any other babysitter would receive."
Suggested script
"Hey [Sister's Name], hope you're doing well. I wanted to talk to you about babysitting the kids. I love spending time with them, and I'm happy to help out. However, I feel like I'm being taken advantage of when I'm expected to babysit for free. I use my time to earn money, just like you do. Going forward, I'd appreciate it if we could discuss compensation for my babysitting services, just like any other babysitter would receive. Let's find a solution that works for both of us."
Remember
Be respectful and assertive
Avoid blaming or accusing language
Focus on your own feelings and needs
Seek a mutually beneficial solution
Good luck with the conversation!

Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Dear Jill,
What do you think about getting a job where I get regular pay. Walmart is hiring and even if it is not full-time it is a start. I am just finishing grade 12. I have some disability issues but I want to work. My family is supportive. What is your advice?

Dear Susan,
Congratulations on your decision to enter the workforce! That's a significant milestone, and I'm happy to help.
Getting a job at Walmart, even if it's not full-time, can be a great starting point. Here's why:
Gain work experience: You'll develop essential skills like communication, teamwork, and time management.
Build confidence: Working will help you become more independent and confident in your abilities.
Explore possibilities: You might discover new interests or strengths that can guide your future career choices.
Financial stability: Regular pay will give you a sense of financial security and independence.
Supportive environment: Walmart has resources and accommodations for employees with disabilities.
Before applying, consider the following:
Disclose your needs: Be open about your disability issues with your employer to ensure you receive the necessary support and accommodations.
Explore available resources: Look into government programs or services that can help you as a young person with disabilities entering the workforce.
Remember, your family's support is crucial, and having them behind you will make a big difference.
Go for it! Apply to Walmart and take the first step towards an exciting new chapter in your life!
Best of luck!
Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Dear Jill,
I get lots of exercise walking our family dog named Tiny. Some days I have other stuff to do or places to go. How do I tell my family that I need a break from walking the dog every day?

Dear Sam,
It's completely reasonable to need a break from walking the dog every day! Here's a suggestion on how to approach the conversation with your family:
Be honest and open
Start by expressing your love for Tiny and the importance of exercise for both you and the dog.
Explain your situation: "Hey family, I've been walking Tiny every day, but lately, I've been feeling overwhelmed with other commitments and responsibilities. I need a break from walking Tiny every day."
Suggest alternative solutions:
"Let's create a schedule where we take turns walking Tiny, so it's not just me every day."
"Can we consider hiring a dog walker or asking a neighbor to help out on busy days?"
"I'd love to walk Tiny on weekends or every other day, but I need some flexibility during the week."
Example script
"Hey everyone, I love walking Tiny and getting exercise, but I'm feeling a bit burnt out. With my other commitments, I need a break from walking Tiny every day. Let's work together to find a solution that works for all of us. Maybe we can create a schedule or find other ways to make sure Tiny gets the exercise he needs. I'd appreciate your understanding and help."
Remember
Be clear and direct about your needs
Show willingness to find alternative solutions
Emphasize the importance of teamwork and shared responsibility
Good luck, and I hope you get the support you need!
Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Dear Jill,
I am trying to date but don't drive. Everything here is difficult to get to without a car. My brother lives in town. Should I go live with my brother? I might be able to find work. I am worried about my parents, I think they don't want me to move.

Dear Ben,
I understand your concerns! Living with your brother could be a good option, but it's essential to consider the pros and cons before making a decision. Here are some points to ponder:
Pros:
Accessibility: Living in town with your brother could make it easier to get around without a car, as public transportation and amenities might be more accessible.
Work opportunities: You might have a better chance of finding work in town, which could help you become more independent.
Social life: Being in town could provide more opportunities to meet new people and potentially find a partner.
Cons:
Family dynamics: As you mentioned, your parents might not be happy about you moving out, which could lead to family tensions.
Living with your brother: While your brother might be supportive, living with a sibling can be challenging, especially if you're used to having your own space.
Independence: While you might gain more independence in some ways, you might also feel like you're relying on your brother for accommodation.
Before making a decision:
Talk to your parents: Have an open and honest conversation with your parents about your reasons for wanting to move. They might be more understanding than you think.
Discuss with your brother: Make sure your brother is comfortable with the idea of you living with him and that you both have clear expectations.
Explore transportation options: Look into public transportation options in your area and consider alternative ways to get around, like carpooling or ride-sharing services.
Weigh your priorities: Think about what's most important to you – independence, work opportunities, social life, or family relationships.
Remember, it's essential to consider your own needs and priorities when making this decision. Take your time, and don't hesitate to seek advice from a trusted friend, family member, or professional counselor if needed.
Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Hi Jill,
I want to go out but need to babysit my niece. She is 4. I live with my sister and family. I have a disability but my school friends all go out. How can I talk to my sister? She works hard and I live in the lower part of the house. I am 25.
Thanks
Eve

Hi Eve,
It's completely understandable that you want to socialize with your friends and have a life outside of babysitting. Approaching this conversation with your sister can be challenging, but being open and honest is key. Here's a suggested script to help you get started:
Example script
"Hey [Sister's Name], can we talk about something important to me? I know I live here with you and your family, and I'm grateful for that. However, I'm feeling a bit stuck. My friends from school are all going out and having fun, and I'm missing out on that. I know I have a disability, but I still want to have a social life. I love spending time with [Niece's Name], but I was wondering if we could find a way to share babysitting responsibilities or find alternative care for her sometimes, so I can go out and enjoy some time with my friends. I promise to make sure [Niece's Name] is well taken care of, and I'll even help find a solution that works for everyone. I just need a bit of freedom and independence."
Tips
Choose a good time to talk when your sister is relaxed and not too busy or stressed.
Be clear and direct about your needs and feelings.
Show appreciation for your sister's hard work and the support she provides.
Emphasize your commitment to your niece's well-being and your willingness to find a solution that works for everyone.
Remember, communication is key! Be open, honest, and respectful, and I hope you'll find a solution that allows you to have a more balanced life. Good luck, Eve!
Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Dear Jill,
You look like a lot of fun. I like your picture. I like girls better than boys. I am 24 and feel safer with girls. My friends say I should be dating boys. What should I do? I have a disability which slows me down but I now live in a basement suite and work at Walmart.

Dear Vicki,
Thank you for your kind words! I'm glad you feel comfortable talking to me.
Firstly, it's amazing that you're living independently in your basement suite and working at Walmart! That takes a lot of courage and determination.
Regarding your relationships, it's essential to remember that your feelings and preferences matter. If you feel safer and more comfortable around girls, that's perfectly okay! Your sexuality and gender preferences are yours to own and express.
Don't let your friends pressure you into dating someone who doesn't align with your feelings. You deserve to be happy and fulfilled in your relationships. Consider exploring LGBTQ+ resources and support groups, which can provide a safe space to connect with others who share your experiences.
Remember, your disability doesn't define you, and you have so much to offer in a relationship. Focus on finding someone who respects and appreciates you for who you are.
Keep being your amazing self, and don't hesitate to reach out if you need further support or guidance!
Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Dear Jill,
My parents won't let me date. I have a disability pension but I need to give it to my family. My sisters are married and I am the only one at home. My aunt offered to let me stay there. She lives in Burnaby. My parents are very religious and my sisters all moved away now they have kids. I miss them. Should I try to go to my aunt's place? She would pick me up. Will I be able to keep my pension?

Daer Toni,
I understand your situation, and it sounds like you're feeling a bit trapped and isolated. Considering your aunt's offer to stay with her in Burnaby might be a good option for you. However, it's essential to clarify a few things before making a decision.
Regarding your pension
In Canada, disability pensions are typically provided by the government to support individuals with disabilities. If you move to your aunt's place, you should still be eligible for your pension, as it's not dependent on your living situation. However, it's crucial to confirm this with the relevant authorities or a social services representative to ensure you understand any potential implications.
Other factors to consider
Family dynamics: It's important to consider how your parents might react to you moving out. They might feel a sense of loss or worry about your well-being. It may be helpful to have an open and honest conversation with them about your feelings and reasons for wanting to move.
Support system: Living with your aunt could provide a fresh start and a supportive environment. However, it's essential to ensure you'll have access to necessary resources, such as healthcare, transportation, and social connections.
Independence: Moving to your aunt's place could be an opportunity to gain more independence and autonomy, which might be beneficial for your personal growth and well-being.
Next steps
Discuss with your aunt: Talk to your aunt about your concerns, pension, and what you hope to achieve by moving in with her. Ensure you both have a clear understanding of the arrangement.
Seek professional advice: Consult with a social services representative or a disability advocate to confirm your pension eligibility and understand any potential implications.
Open conversation with your parents: Share your feelings and reasons for wanting to move with your parents. This might help them understand your perspective and come to terms with the change.
Remember, prioritize your well-being and take the time to make an informed decision that suits your needs.
Advice provided by Meta AI. https://ai.meta.com/meta-ai/

Dear Jill,
If you're in a romantic relationship and the guy you're with keeps saying that he wants to be committed to you and doesn't comes through is the relationship real or not. Depressed girl in Abbotsford

Dear Sarah,
If the guy wasn't meant to be, then he wasn't meant to be. A guy has to be truly commited in order for a relationship to work out, and he should know that, does he want a girlfriend, or not? If he wants a girlfriend, he should treat a woman with respect.

Dear Jill,
We have a few friends that are mean and nasty.
Can you please give us some advice on what to do.we have a few friends that are mean and nasty. Can you please give us some advice on what to do.

Dear Trudy,
I'd be careful around them. Are they real friends?
Some friends can say that they're friends, but you can never tell. If they keep acting the way they are, then what's the point of having a freindship?

Dear Jill
I find it hard to keep the same girlfriend for more than a month. My mom says I should give up on girls but I think I have not found the right girl for me yet, What do you think? Tommy

Dear Tommy,
I know what you mean. Covid has made dating much tougher. I think you should start with the basics. Spruce yourself up. Good hygiene goes a long way. Focus on the other person. give it a try.
Take care,
Jill

Dear Jill,
I got a dog for Christmas. How often should I take it for a walk?

Dear Tom,
You should take your dog for a walk at least 2 times a day.
Good luck
Jill

Dear Jill,
This is hard to write about. I am quite over weight and I am getting teased at school. I have tried losing weight but this makes me anxious and when I get anxious I eat more. What do you suggest
Bob

Dear Bob,
This is a good question, Bob. I have found that getting help from Weight Watchers or exercising with friends is the best approach.
Take care
Jill

Dear Jill,
My son is about to start school. His name is Tim. I am afraid he will be teased for his size. What can I do to help.
Suzy from Calgary

Dear Suzy,
You should talk to the principal about your concerns, The school can probably link Tim up with some older students to mentor him and look out for him.
Take care,
Jill